I have no memory of the explosion. My earliest memories after after the bombing is being in intensive care... I was probably the last person to find out that Elaine had been killed.

When I first started to talk to you, the picture was going to be of my, trauma, my, journey. 

But very soon it became apparent to you, before me, the thing that dominated our conversation and all my injuries aside, can't compare to the loss of Elaine for me.

And when you first mentioned you were going to be painting Elaine, I was a bit taken aback and I thought, wow. I felt it felt too personal.