Marriage
'Marriage is a high state, of great dignity’
The Catholic Church teaches that marriage is a gift from God (a sacrament). Medieval religious writings such as ‘Speculum Vitae’ and ‘Mirur’ were clear that one of the reasons for marriage was to prevent sin. Sexual behaviour outside marriage was considered to be a mortal sin.
Even inside marriage there were limits on the types and timing of sexual behaviour that could be engaged in without risk to the soul. For example, intercourse during menstruation was forbidden (although the Wollaton Library Collection copy of ‘Speculum Vitae’ has had these 32 lines removed). For more on sexual misconduct and its consequences, see the themes on Advice and Behaviour and Dress, and Punishing Sin.
During the medieval period, weddings were increasingly performed in church rather than in private homes, although a marriage was valid simply through the agreement of the two parties.
Records from the court of the Archdeaconry of Nottingham show that in the 16th and 17th centuries the church authorities were prosecuting people for ‘clandestine marriage’ (that is, being married outside church, or without banns or licence). However, it was not until 1753 that Lord Hardwicke’s Marriage Act actually required a formal and public ceremony for a marriage to be lawful. Popular confusion over why a ‘common-law marriage’ is not valid still makes the news today.
The following extracts from literary and historical texts give some insights into marriage in medieval society.
Transcripts and translations for manuscript items are also available for download:
Document 1: John Gower, ‘Traitié...pour essampler les amantz marietz’ (composed late 14th century, French)
This short poem, written in the courtly French language by the English poet John Gower, deals with the sacrament of marriage and the damage that infidelity and deception will do to the union. In this extract Gower explains that when love and virtue are the reasons for the marriage, rather than avarice, then faithfulness is the 'by-product' of the union. Conversely, when a deceiver contracts a marriage, the appearance of the union and the reality of the relationship are deceptive and it is doomed from the start to be unhappy.
He uses the imagery of a single strand being quite different from the same material when it is worked at and made into a stronger cord. The word ‘girded' in the second verse may be following this notion.
The ‘thought’ or ‘intention’ which a person brought to church was considered very important in order to make a true or meaningful sacrament, and was much debated theologically. This concept is also discussed in relation to the sacrament of Penance.
Ref: WLC/LM/8, ff. 201r-v
Transcription and Translation
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Ovesque amour qant loialte sequeinte lors sont les noeces bones et ioiouses mais lui guilers qant il se fait pluis queint Par falssemblant les fait souent doubtouses A loial qant pluis resemblont amerouses Cest en cy come de stouppes vn corde Qant le penser a son semblant descorde
Celle espousaile est assetz forte et seinte Damour v . sont les causes vertouses Si lespousaile est dauarice enceint Et qe les causes soient trucherouses Ja ne serront les noeces graciouses Car conscience toutdis se remorde Qant le penser a son semblant discorde
Honeste amour qone loialte sa queinte Fait qe les noeces serront gloiouses Et qui son coer ad mys par tiel empeinte Nestoet doubter les chainiges perilouses Om dit qe noeces sont auenturouses Car la fortune en tiel lien ne sacorde Qant le penser a son semblant discorde
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With love great faithfulness [will] follow, Then, at that time, the wedding is good and joyful. But when he, the deceiver, is knowingly more malicious, [Then] by his cunning these unions are often made into something to be feared When, to the eye, [it may seem] a loving [union].It is, thus, like [the difference between] tow and a piece of cord[1] When thought and its image are opposed.
This union is strong and holy, Where made of love[2], the reasons are virtuous. If [however] the marriage is girded with avarice The reasons may be based on trickery and lies. [Then] never will the union be favoured or be blessed, Because conscience always torments itself, When thought and its image are opposed.
When pure and virtuous love are brought together with fidelity Then the union will be blessed with grace, And he who, in his heart, accepts such a commitment Will not be afraid of threatening changes. They say that marriages are full of chance, As [indeed] Fortune does not [act in] harmony in such a union When thought and its image are opposed.
1. Tow = a strand. Cord = a number of strands twisted or woven together
2. An alternative translation is 'Of love five are the causes/reasons for marriage'.
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Document 2: ‘Speculum Vitae’, lines 10991-11032 (composed mid-14th century, English)
View image with transcript/translation
Marriage is described and explained in this devotional poem as a holy sacrament, invented by God, and necessary in order to prevent men from being sinful. It is also important as a symbol of the relationship between man and God.
Ref: WLC/LM/9, ff. 169r-v
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De Statu Coniugatorum
¶ For spousayle is as men may se A state of gret autorite Of dignite and of holynes Þorow þese þre spousayle stabled es ¶ Of gret autorite is it As bereth witnes holy writ For whi oure lord god rightwise Hit stabled first in paradyse In the state of obedience Or euer man synned þorow neclygence Þerfore men schuld þorow al her myght Þat state kepe clene bothe day and nyght As techeth and biddeth holy writ Be resoun of god þat stabled hit And be resoun of þe stede clene Þer it was first stabled sene ¶ Also spousayle is an hey state Of gret dignite as clerkes wate ¶ For whi oure lord wold borne be Of a wedded womman þat was fre Þat was blestful mary mayden clene Þat Joseph wedded hir to mayntene Gods sone before þe hey message Made hir þe mantel of mariage And wold be vnder þe mantel hem Conceyued and borne with oute wem ¶ Vnder þe mantel as clerkes kan telle Was hid fro þe fend of helle Þe conseile of oure saluacioun And þe priuite of oure ransoun Þerfore men schold þat state worschepe And honestly and clene it kepe ¶ Hit is also þer it is wemles A state of gret holynes For it is on of þe sacramentes Þat holy chirche myche tentes And betokeneþ þe spousayle Þat is knyt and neuer schal fayle Betwene ihesu crist and holy chirche Þorow whos counseile vs behoueth wirche And betwene god on þe same manere And mannes soule þat boght dere
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[On the state of marriage]
The sacrament of marriage is, as men say, a state of excellent authority, of spiritual worth, and of holiness. Through these three things marriage is permanently ordained. It is of excellent authority, as Holy Writ bears witness, because our good Lord God established it in Paradise first, in that state of obedience, before man sinned through negligence.
Therefore, man should try to remain in a pure state, both day and night, as is taught and required in Holy Writ, by God’s reason, who established it, and because of the holy place [Paradise, the Garden of Eden] where it was first established and seen.
Also, marriage is a high state, of great dignity, as learned men know, because our Lord was born of a married woman who was not in sin. She was the blessed Mary, a maiden, whom Joseph married to maintain her purity. Under the mantle of that marriage, God ordained that his Son would be conceived and born without blemish. Under that mantle’s disguise, as learned men can tell, He was protected from the Fiend of Hell, he was the counsel of our salvation, and the sacred mystery of our redemption.
Therefore man should worship that state and keep it respectable and pure. It is also blemish-free, a state of great holiness, because it is one of the sacraments that the Holy Church observes greatly. And it is a sign of the marriage that unites, and never shall be broken, between Jesus Christ and the Holy Church – through whose instruction we are bidden to work – and in the same way between God and man’s souls that he redeemed at a high price.
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Document 3: Robert of Gretham, 'Mirur', lines 2474-2517 (composed c.1250, Anglo-Norman)
All of Robert’s teaching was based on the Gospels. Each sermon consisted of three parts:
- The Gospel text for that day, which was a translation from the Latin Vulgate Bible.
- An explanation of the underlying meaning or the deep sense hidden behind the text.
- A practical teaching, drawn from his explanation.
Robert did not allow himself to 'wander into the realms of fantasy' when choosing the material for his sermons. Passages from the Gospels formed the basis of a unified corpus of material used by preachers at the time. However, other writers, such as the author of ‘Le Manuel des Péchés’, also sourced their tales from elsewhere.
This sermon deals with the idea that marriage is for the ‘cure’ or salvation of fleshly corruption. Virginity was considered desirable, but it was recognised that not all could keep to a vow of chastity. In fact, it was believed that some women would suffer ill health through lack of sexual activity. To avoid these problems, God made the sacrament of marriage, which was endorsed by Jesus through his presence at the wedding at Cana.
Ref: WLC/LM/4, ff. 71v-72r
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A s espusailles fu marie. E iesus e sa compaignie. S achez grant est li sacremenz. V tant sunt de si seinte genz. E vus deuez tenir cher. L a rien ki deus uont tant amer. K ar tut ni seit il charnelment. V ncore est il en present. K ar quantquen seinte iglise est feit. E n sa presence tut esteit. E ki ken seit le seruitur. S ue est la force e le uigur. T ut ausi cum est de baptistire. E de espusaille est il sire. A s espusailles uin faillit. K ar la uielz lei nert pas parfit. D espuser nest perfectiun. K i nest feit si pur faute nun. K i ne se poet pucelle guarder. S aluer se poet par espuser. P ur saluer charnel corrupture. F ist deus i ceste seinte cure. E lewe bien co signefie. K e en uin i fut conuertie. K ar ewe est chose esculuriable. E ia par sei nen ert estable. N un est la char kar ia ne fine. M ais tut dis en pis se decline. ¶ I esus fist lewe mettre en pere. Q uant il estrainst tele manere. Q uant il estrainst nos charneltez. Q ue ne seium trop des-laiz. K e dur seium contre le mal. E ne seium trop comunal. ¶ Mais nuls nen auerat guarisun. S en part feit bien . e en part nun. P ur co fist deus del ewe uin. P ur demustrer le dreit chemin. L i uin eschaufe si en yuere. E de cures le quor deliuere. S i feit la lei del espuser. L es quors eschauffe par amer. E en yure pur mals leisser. E cures tolt de fol penser. |
[The sermon alternates lines from scripture with commentaries by the author Robert of Gretham]
Scripture: At the marriage feast were Mary, Jesus and his companions.
Robert of Gretham: Know well that so great is the Sacrament of marriage that there were many saintly men there and that you must cherish and hold dear this thing that God loves so much.
Although he is not there in the flesh he is, nevertheless, always present because when something is done in the Holy Church everything is known to him as he is always present. To him who is there as a servant, he [God] is the power and strength of all that there is. As he is also at baptism, and of marriage he is Lord.
Scripture: At the wedding feast the wine ran out.
Robert of Gretham: 'For the old Law[1] was not perfect', for marriage is not the way to 'perfection'. However, for those who are unable to keep their maidenhood and would otherwise be corrupted by desires of the flesh, for them, God has made this holy work[2]. And the water which was turned into wine symbolises well this state. For water is always flowing and moving and (because of its nature) can never remain stable by itself. Such is the flesh that is never satisfied and thus, all say, it continues to degenerate, always going from bad to worse.
Scripture: Jesus put the water into stone. Robert of Gretham: When he restrained it in that manner (it is like) when he restrains our desires of the flesh, so that we are not overcome with evil and can stand firm against it. And this means that all men will be helped and none will be set apart: all will recover their health if he is in part good but in part is not. This is the reason that God changed the water into wine, to show man the true road and the right way. The wine heats in this manner to intoxicate and by doing so the cares and worries (carnal desire) of the heart are released. If the law of marriage is kept, the hearts are heated by love and the intoxication of evil caused by such desires are left behind and the heart is cured of all misguided thoughts.
1 'la viele lei' can also have the meaning of 'The Old Testament'. 2. This could also translate as 'cure'.
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Document 4: William of Waddington, ‘Le Manuel des Péchés’ (composed c.1220-1240, Anglo-Norman)
Marriage in the late twelfth century was defined as a union which was 'made with the consent of the two contracting parties'. However, by the thirteenth century church authorities were becoming increasingly involved in marriage practices. Symbolising this changing view and 'take-over' by the church was the move to have marriages made openly and publicly. Before this period people traditionally got married in the domestic space of houses, but increasingly from the end of the twelfth century marriages took place at the door of the church. This open declaration outside the church was then followed by a priest's blessing and nuptial mass inside the church. ‘Secret’ or ‘clandestine’ marriages were still looked upon as legally valid and binding, even without this public event and subsequent blessing, but those partaking were warned about the danger to their soul.
This text was written during a time of change, and emphasises both the importance of free will and consent, and an open marriage at the church.
Ref: WLC/LM/4, f. 34v
Transcription and Translation
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¶ N e matrimoigne ne deit desturber K i uoldra estre sanz blamer. ¶ Q uant home fiet pur uerite. K e a tort sunt alcuns espusee. S e il nel mustre a seint eglise. Q uite ne pot estre en nule guise. K i co ne feit est consentant. E malement pot peccher par tant. Kar ki a larrun ad consenti. V ele peine deit auer od li. |
Neither should anyone interfere with marriage which is contracted sincerely and truthfully if they themselves wish to be without reproach. (It is said) that some are illegally married in supposing that he or she do not meet together at the church, but if this does happen they cannot in any way be discharged from their legal obligation. Even so, if entering into a marriage is not freely done then it is evil and they sin. And, if the marriage takes place in secret but nevertheless it is freely done, they will suffer equally for this. |
Next page: Marriage Arrangements